The tear held the past four years within its glassy dome. Its surface was unbroken and smooth, sliding down my cheek, leaving a shiny track that shone and reflected the sky above that was invisible to my closed eyes. It was a jewel of defeat, of acceptance, of pain that could be wiped from my face but worn in eternity.
Everything we had built together resided within that tear, all of the late night talks and plans of the future as we lay in each other’s arms. How can something so small contain everything that we were supposed to be?
As the tear traveled further down my cheek, I replayed our time together in a fast reel of laughter and growth and happiness. The reel skipped the fights and dull moments that you claimed caused our demise. I focused the reel on your face when I asked you to marry me, I focused it on the moans you gave when my hands were on your body, I focused on your smile.
The tear grew cold as it reached my neck. I reviled in the discomfort I felt from the tear and refused to wipe it away. There was nothing more to feel but that cold and overwhelming defeat. Wiping it away would relegate me to an emotionless existence that didn’t have you.
Just one tear. Just one.
I reached up and wiped it away.